Saturday, February 16, 2008

I'll have Polar Bear Tartare with Clay Pot Vegetables Cooked with A Ton of Mint

I stopped watching The Grammys and The Emmys years ago. I will sometimes sneak a peak at the Tonys before bed so that I can see the musical numbers, but I often totally forget they are on. I can't understand how anyone can sit through the entire Super Bowl without lots and lots of breaks. But I love the Academy Awards and I sit through them every year, missing as few moments as possible. I don't know why the Oscars have never fallen by the wayside for me. I'm sure that there's a lot of nostalgia involved. I was raised on a steady diet of awards shows, and even to this day, my mother and sister and I will spend a large fraction of the Oscars on the phone with each other during the broadcast. After all, we can't have other people deciding who looks good and who doesn't for us. And even though this year I've only seen one movie, which is about all I usually have seen since they made the broadcast date in February instead of March, I'm sure that I will have strong opinions about the many movies that I haven't even seen.

A couple of years ago, I got HDTV, which I actually don't make good use of, but I definitely watch the Oscars on it. I get no thrill seeing wrinkles on aging actresses' faces, but I do enjoy seeing details on their gowns that regular television can't pick up.

For a few years, I made dinners where each dish had to have a name (or occasionally a theme) that matched a nominated movie. So, in the past, we have had to endure my Gosford Pork and Million Dollar Baby Back Ribs and Buttermilk Seabiscuits.

I don't think I'll be doing any big cooking this year, but I still like to make a virtual menu. This year's nominees seem to be taxing my limited talents. So, have at it. What should I serve for my imaginary meal? Here are the nominees:

No Country for Old Men
There will be Blood
Michael Clayton

I promise that I will bring the imaginary Pepto-Bismol.


Patrick J. Vaz said...

Wrinkles on the aging actresses? What you get to see is that their faces have been botoxed into immobility.
All I could come up with for the three inventions was boring and obvious: CDs, DVDs, the Internet. And now your Oscar meal has stumped me. I'm starting to feel really inadequate. It's just like a real Christmas!
All I could come up with was "There Will Be Blood (Since Vicki Is Making Steak the Way She Likes It)" and "No Country for Old Men cornmeal mush". Pretty sad, juno? juthink?

vicmarcam said...

LOLAHSI on your meal ideas.

The Botox thing is why the wrinkles aren't thrilling. I'd rather see the wrinkles than the Botox, as I think most people would. But I suspect those actors would rather I wasn't sitting at home saying, "Good for you, daring to show all your wrinkles on high definition!"

Nothing boring about your inventions. You chose things that are entertaining and allow you to stay home and enjoy them. I chose things that make my life run more smoothly so that I have some time to use the things that you chose.

Unknown said...

Well, baked Alaska seems like an obvious choice. Or something Greek. As for Atonement, you're off the hook for that one because you're supposed to fast on the day of atonement.

Anonymous said...

Well, for your party you need to start with some Diet Coke, and as everyone knows, with Diet Coke you need A-ton-of-Mentos. but in your house you must remind people there is No Country Crock (fake butter) for Old Mentos, You'll just have to settle with real butter. Like any good party there will be Blood Oranges and June-o-berries.

Sorry, I'm at a loss for Michael Clayton, I guess clay pot would work.

vicmarcam said...

Wow. We're getting close to things that I might actually serve. Keep up the good work.

Unknown said...

Okay, I'm concerned that you're getting close to actual dishes. For one thing, what is a June-o-berry? And also, just thinking about diet coke, mentos, and butter together is making me sick. (I was totally down with the polar bear tartare for some reason).

Patrick J. Vaz said...

If you're not careful, that guy who is always coming to my blog looking for "narwhal recipes" is going to end up here too.

vicmarcam said...

I was picking and choosing! I like the Baked Alaska and I like the No Country Crock and the There will be Blood steaks or Blood Oranges.

Anonymous said...

I say just make sure there are a couple of old men!!